Date My warmly welcomes you.
Meet likeminded singles and share your ideas here at one of the UK's most innovative online dating websites.

admin's blog

Our first Guest Blog is written by one of America's leading dating experts Joshua Pompey. He sheds his expertise on the topic of talking to women online, for all the single men out there.

For many men online dating can be a frustrating task. When things are going great, having unlimited potential dates right at your fingertips is nothing short of amazing.  But when things are going bad, the amount of time wasted sending out emails can really add up in a hurry. The goal of online dating should be to form connections, not to feel as if you are working a second job with a terrible payoff.Well here’s the good news. Receiving responses from women online is an easy task once you learn all the little nuances of online dating. But it all begins with giving yourself a proper education. Follow all my rules and I could get your response rate up to at least thirty percent. But first things first. Let’s take a look at three things that that you need to know before sending out that first message online.

1.  Beautiful women are in extreme demand online.

Think beautiful woman get hit on a lot at bars? Well in the online world, those same beautiful women will be hit on a rate that shatters anything these women would experience in the “real” world. This is because the same men that fear face-to-face rejection have no fear of hitting on a woman behind the safety net of a computer screen. On any given day you might be competing with 20 to 50 men for the same girl.Does this mean you have no chance online or a better chance of meeting women at a bar? Absolutely not. What it does mean though is that you must be extremely interesting, engaging, and give women a reason to want to write you back. There will be many men to choose from every week. So make yourself into the best choice, which all starts with writing the perfect email.

2.  Women can’t resist men that make them laugh.  

Men have a number of tools at their disposal to attract women and tend to feel an attraction towards men based on a whole variety of qualities that have absolutely nothing to do with looks, such as confidence, demonstrating alpha male qualities, showing value, etc. It’s one of the huge benefits of being a guy. But of all the tools a man can use to attract a woman online, humour is by far the most superior. When you make a woman laugh, her interest will immediately start to perk up. If you can carry the laughter from your first email, all the way through to your profile, then you will exponentially increase your chances of a first date eventually being granted. At the end of the day, when a woman is deciding who to go on a date with, she’s most likely going to choose the man that shows the most potential of fun. And humour is what reveals this potential.

3.  Canned emails will instantly be deleted.

I know what you’re thinking. It’s really hard to come up with something original to write in every single email. I get it. It’s rough. But you know what’s even rougher? Sending out fifty emails and getting rejected by every one of them. And that is exactly what will happen if you email out the same message to fifty women. The truth is, women can spot these types of canned emails a mile away.  No woman wants to feel as if she is getting hit on by some pick up line.  Women want to feel unique and special. So put in the extra effort and come up with something creative. I promise you, the effort will be worth it when all is said and done.

Joshua Pompey has been helping online daters to succeed with online dating through his products and services at a success rate of over 99% For more information on how you could write the perfect first message in 90 seconds or less, read this article Or find the perfect material for messaging women by learning about his world famous online dating guides for men.

Have you just gone through a divorce or separation? Our latest guest blog comes from Divorce Lawyer, Mena Ruparel on dating after separation.

In my job as a divorce lawyer, I meet a lot of people who have started dating someone new, even though they aren’t divorced yet. Most of the time my clients are too shy to mention to me that they are dating. However, I usually get to see their financial details at some point or another and I notice that they are paying subscriptions to dating websites.

In a survey released this week, Aviva have found out that the average person getting divorced spends £1,227 per annum on dating. This isn’t surprising to me at all, particularly when compared to the other costs that go hand in hand with building a new life as a single person. The same survey states that £1,483 is spent on new clothes and a further £1,853 on life coaching or therapy. In my view, these costs go hand in hand to build a new, possibly happier, life after divorce. Bearing in mind that legal costs to draw a line under the old relationship are stated to be £1,280, the cost of finding a new relationship seem to be a better investment!

In the Daily Mail, a divorcee spent every penny of her savings on a “Divorce makeover”. She says that she has no regrets at spending £65,000 re-inventing herself. Her costs included a (very reasonable) online dating subscription at £20 per month! As is the case with many new singles, she was also paying babysitters to look after her children, sharing the cost of meals on dates and the cost of pre date hair and make-up. She has no regrets about the money she spent on her makeover.

Mena Ruparel is a Solicitor, Arbitrator and Writer. She writes articles and books on the subject of divorce and relationships

Nowadays thanks to all the social platforms we all have unlimited photos of ourselves. It is well known that having a photo on your profile can dramatically increase interest and first impressions really do mean everything with online dating, so choosing the right photo is make or break.

We asked some online daters for their top cliche pictures of men: 

  • "The unashamed mirror selfie you took before you went out the other night, pouting, hair gelled to perfection yet not a hint of happiness in your eyes."
  • "Look at me touching this tiger in Vietnam during my gap year; yes I climbed the Great Wall of China, or how about a photo of me sat in a plastic garden chair about to bungee off an Australian cliff. I’m well-travelled you know."
  • "Gym/flexing muscles selfie. I, along with other women who may or may not admit it secretly love a topless shot, but lifting up your top to show us your ab-tastic stomach and cutting out your face; major cringe"
  • "Lying in bed, hinting that you are naked, arm draped effortlessly, yet strategically over your head and giving a subtle seductive smile. Slightly creepy"
  • "You holding a (really, really cute) child and then writing on your about me ‘the child is a family friend’.  I don’t even know why this one annoys me"
  • "Standing in a group photo where we can’t tell which one you are or worse, having a better looking in friend the photo with you. Who is he, is he single, may I speak with him instead?"

Most seem in agreement that being well-groomed, travelled, fit, child-friendly is welcomed, but as a first impression - a recent shot of a genuine and comfortable smile is all that is required.

As the number of relationships that have started online increases (it is now the second most common way to meet someone new), has the stereotype of an average online dater being old, desperate and lonely gone?

There is a huge market in online dating and no shortage of specialist sites suiting people with similar interests, hobbies and cultures. The more traditional online dating sites allow you to upload some photos, write an about you, list your favourite hobbies, your height, weight and any other information you decide. And then if the site doesn’t match make for you, you browse through the thousands, narrowing down on the handy side panels and carefully choose some people whose profiles seem attractive to you.  It’s a bit like online window shopping but for a relationship.

Modern apps like Tinder completely cut out the comparably lengthy process and allows you to quickly decide yes or no based on a profile photo, and if you wish to look further; a short sentence or two on their ‘about me’ section. In an age where everything has been shortened with digital technology, this kind of communication has become incredibly popular, but should it really be described as a dating app. Tinder describes themselves as a lifestyle app which acts as a platform for connecting new and interesting people around you. This fast paced system has become popular especially within the younger generation who wish to meet up for casual short term relationships, if not a one night stand. These apps are much more playful and less serious than traditional online dating sites which help to lessen the idea that the user is desperate or seriously looking for a relationship and therefore not associated with the stereotypically older online dater looking for love.

There are plenty of internet pages dedicated to users sharing their experiences using these apps including the funniest, creepiest and cheesiest chat up attempts they’ve encountered which also helps to keep the whole thing a lot more light hearted. It seems to be used as a way for young people to ‘hook up’ rather than find love or anything long-term. Jean-Claude Kaufmann in his book Love Online discusses the change in relationships since the millennium.  Thanks to online dating sites, Kaufmann suggests, “there was now a vast hypermarket for love and/or sex, in which everyone was both a buyer and seller who openly stated what they wanted and tried to satisfy their needs as efficiently as possible.”

Considering by 2030 it has been predicted that 1 in 2 relationships will begin online, so far apps such as Tinder ultimately seem to have helped partly remove the embarrassment of engaging in online dating especially within the younger 20-somethings. For now, although it is generally becoming more socially acceptable, it would only take a few swipes on these apps to realise there is still a slight stigma attached to the idea of online dating as a large number of people have written in their bio: “if anyone asks, we met in a bar”.  

So you know two single people, and obviously you think they are just perfect for each other! But how do you go about setting them up? Here are some tips we’ve put together for you.

1. Find similarities
Firstly, work out if they have any common ground. Opposites can and do attract but there should be some commonality. Casually mention each other in conversation so that their names are familiar.

2. Arrange a meeting
The next step is to organise where, when and how to get them to meet in person. Do not let them know your matchmaking plans because this adds pressure and nerves will make the whole thing awkward when they do meet. Suggest they both come and meet you and some other friends at a bar where it's busy enough for them to not feel under the spotlight and is a great place for striking up casual conversation.

3. The introduction
Introduce each other and mention one or two things they have in common, then allow conversation between them to flow naturally. If it doesn’t initially, don’t force it, remember you can't create chemistry these things take time.

4. Take a step back
If and when your plan works and they do start to take things further, take credit in silence and don’t keep pestering them about how it’s going. A genuine relationship can take time to form, but by all means bask in your matchmaking glory.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 ... Next »


Password protected photo
Password protected photo
Password protected photo